Kimberly Hirsh

Hey guess what I passed my comps. Taking a post-comps hiatus. See y’all Monday.

It’s remarkable how chill I am about my comps oral exam tomorrow. I guess I’m just… ready.

This little comb-bound packet represents a year’s worth of work.

Today I finished my dissertation proposal and sent it to my committee. I sent them the literature review for my comprehensive qualifying exam at the end of October. On Tuesday, I’ll take the oral examination part of the comprehensive qualifying exam. My advisor and I are trying to find a way to expedite my proposal defense, because I’m ready. The proposal defense is the last milestone before I submit and defend my dissertation (expect to submit & defend spring 2021). If you have supported me in any way in the four and a half years it’s taken to get here, thank you so much.

NOW I’ve finished my dissertation proposal, and even sent it to my committee ahead of my comps.

Candidacy, here I come!

How did I not know that it’s not just me, but rather the entire Internet, that refers to Carrie Fisher as “space mom”? Miss you space mom. Love you space mom.

NPR’s Book Concierge is live and Tumblr’s Fandom Year-in-Review is out. It is truly the most wonderful time of the year.

This morning, when W. and M. were sleeping in, I could have chosen to do one of many different things, whether I wanted to spend that time productively or on leisure. I chose to play the visual novel Choices, which is one of Tumblr’s top gaming-related tags right now. When I wasn’t able to do any more chapters there, I switched to The Arcana: A Mystic Romance. I’ve also got a vampire one installed, but I haven’t tried it yet.

It should surprise no one who knows me well that I like these games. I got obsessed with the Ace Attorney series for a while and pretty much treat all Bioware games like they’re otome with combat. Don’t get me started on Dream Daddy and how I can’t bring myself to choose between Goth Dad and Barista Pun Dad. (In real life, I married gothish barista pun dad.)

I read a piece a while back about how young women are making businesses out of writing stories and developing them for some of these games. I’m definitely keeping my eye on this as a potential area for research.

I… think I’m almost done with my dissertation proposal?

I went thrifting yesterday by myself for the first time since having M. Thrifting used to be a source of great fun. When I was in high school, I scored myself a coveted collection of velvet blazers from thrift stores. When I was in college, I often went to the vintage store near campus and loved just browsing the racks. Yesterday, I went to the thrift store with a couple of purposes in mind:

1. Buy components for a Tifa Lockhart cosplay.
2. Grab anything that caught my eye that would help me lean more into my various seasonal aesthetics (holiday goth, faerie goth, mer-goth, goth girl fall).

I tried on a few things, including a skirt that would have worked okay for Tifa. But I didn’t feel great about myself in it, so in the end I didn’t buy it.

I spent about two hours in the thrift store, looked at every department. For the first hour or so, it felt kind of fun. But by the end I found myself thinking, “This isn’t how I want to spend my time.” To really have success with thrifting, you need to do it often. And I just don’t have it in me anymore.

And that’s okay. Things change.

I do like browsing online resale places, like ThredUp, Poshmark, and Depop, though everything on Depop is priced too high for me to spend on something I probably had in my closet 20 years ago.

After I left the thrift store, I went to the creative reuse center/store that’s across the parking lot. (They’re both owned by the same non-profit.) That place was a wonderland. When I was in middle and high school, they were this kind of cool place with lots of weird cast-offs that you could turn into art if you were super clever with reuse. I’m not super clever with reuse; where other people see artistic possibilities, I just see stuff. But now, this place is so huge and full of stuff for less creative types like me: fabric, yarn, sewing notions, so much cool ephemera… I feel like I could definitely get a good collage out of paper I found there, and I think all my craft projects will now begin with a trip there. (Fortunately, in the same shopping center, there’s a local craft store, so I can hit all my needs in one trip.)

They also just sometimes have cool stuff. So, for example, I got my kid a gorgeous pair of fairy wings, a notebook, and a complete alphabet cookie cutter set. All 3 things for $9. Pretty great.

This weekend was a good weekend. On Saturday, we had a harvest meal at the Montessori/co-working space. We brought grapes. They seemed to be a big hit. It was a really rainy day, so we spent the afternoon watching TV: the first 20 minutes or so of Paddington 2 but then it got a bit confusing, so we switched to Curious George. I actually put my head down and stretched out on the couch and drowsed. It was glorious.

I remember the winter of 2014-2015, when Dragon Age: Inquisition had just come out. There were days when we would set up in front of the projector screen and W. would play DA:I for long hours while I napped beside him. It was an immensely pleasant time and I remember it with great fondness. I wouldn’t trade having my kid for all the naps I could imagine, but it’s still nice to squeeze one in. There’s something different about a nap on the couch next to your loved ones while a screen is on, as opposed to in silence alone in bed. I think it feels festive, somehow. It’s that post-holiday-meal vibe. It’s luxurious and drowsy and it was so pleasant that I think I might try to do it more often.

We were going to go out to dinner with my family of origin, but M. fell asleep on the way there so we just turned around and went back home.

Sunday we went to breakfast with them and W.’s mom, then M. and I headed to the Museum of Life and Science to meet a friend of his and her mom. When we were done there, we went home and eventually I got around to watching bits of Bakara Wintner’s live tarot reading on Instagram for the first time ever. I’ve wanted to for a long time, but it’s rare that the timing works out. This time I was able to put it on while I was cooking. I wish I’d been watching from the beginning. I hope I get to do it again, soon. I really like her vibe and would love to just see her more in general. I feel like I’ve read her book a thousand times since I got it a couple years ago. It makes me happy. Maybe happier even than actually pulling cards does? But maybe that’s about getting more practice. I’m really practiced at reading. Less so at tarot.

I fell asleep super early last night but then woke up around midnight and I don’t know what, maybe read about online diarists at the turn of the millennium? That sounds right.

I woke up again around 4 and watched the first episode of The Mandalorian. I’m always trying to figure out how to find the next media thing I want to experience. I can’t keep up, both because we’re past the era of peak TV into the era of too much of everything to have a monocultural conversation (which is fine, more different things is always good, just harder to follow) so last night I decided to work a combo of Tumblr’s fandom statistics, Archive of Our Own’s top fandoms, and NPR’s Pop Culture blog coverage to help me decide.

So The Mandalorian. I just re-watched Star Wars: A New Hope for the first time in years Saturday night. I found that I still love it, that Princess Leia continues to be my hero, that Obi Wan continues to be my favorite Jedi, and that it’s only the first two thirds of the movie that makes me sleepy. I don’t love all of the changes Lucas has made to it over the years, mostly because the aesthetic feels disjointed in scenes where stuff has been digitally added in.

But it was a really interesting thing to do right before starting The Mandalorian, which I gather takes place between Return of the Jedi and The Force Awakens? I’ve read nothing about it, so I’m not sure.

It has this interesting feel. It doesn’t feel like Star Wars, although it does have all of the visuals and worldbuilding references that clue you in that yes, this is a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away. It feels kind of like Firefly and, to a lesser extent, Serenity. To the point where I was like, “Is the Mandalorian played by Nathan Fillion?” (Nope. He’s Pedro Pascal. But they have similar voices.) I’m looking forward to catching more of it, then reading what other people have said about it.

I wish I could tell little 13/14 year old me, back in 1995, that she actually DOES like a genre of popular music, it’s just R&B, and it’s not her fault all her friends are into alternative and she’s the only one who likes R&B and that also R&B is a very legitimate genre of music for a 13/14 yo in 1995 to love.

Anybody got tips on automating Instagram data collection (specifically images, post text, comments) for qual analysis for someone with no Python experience? A total API n00b?

My kid’s preferred type of narrative conflict is Bear vs. Self.

Current hobby: lying in bed and re-watching Downton Abbey.

Just sent my completed comps package off to my advisor with plans to send it to my committee next week.

Just finished writing the first draft of my last chapter of my comps package!

The world is like “Why are comedians depressed and anxious?” and “Why are academics depressed and anxious?” and “Why are moms depressed and anxious?” But I was depressed and anxious before I did comedy or went to grad school or had a kid. So do those things draw depressed and anxious people? Do they make people depressed and anxious? Or is everyone depressed and anxious?

TFW your birthing day float therapy self-care appointment gets cancelled & you spend your babysitting time waiting on a very late handyman.

Obligatory voting selfie!

Today my doctor pointed out that after gestating a child for 9 months and nursing him for 33 months, I should give my hormones longer than 3 months to figure out their next move.

Threw off my anxiety just long enough to ask my doctor for anxiety meds. (Reader, she prescribed them.)

On my commute this morning I was pondering further whether I’m a Ravenclaw or Slytherin. Since we know the Sorting Hat takes wishes into account, I thought, “Well, which would I tell the Sorting Hat to put me in?” Then I thought, “I don’t want to be in the same house as people like Crabbe and Goyle, so, Ravenclaw.” Then I thought, “Yes, Ravenclaw people will be more fun to spend time with at Hogwarts.” Then I thought, “But what will knowing Ravenclaw people get me after I leave Hogwarts?” And the fact that I asked that question, well… BETTER BE SLYTHERIN.

Wizarding World app just sorted me into Slytherin, just as Pottermore did many years ago, so I guess maybe it’s time to accept that it, and not Ravenclaw, is my true house?