Are you in academia or alt-ac? Talk to me about your current productivity or lack thereof, the grace you’re giving yourself right now, whether you’re bothering with CFPs or just trying to get your most important obligations handled.
From Lauren Elkin: "Why All the Books About Motherhood?"
I’ve been sitting on Lauren Elkin’s article asking “Why all the books about motherhood? for a year and a half and only read it fully for the first time today. It offers an immense reading list of books related to motherhood. Many of them are written by mothers, and so I think by default curating their writing counts as curating stories of creative mothers.
Elkin quotes Jenny Offill in an interview with Vogue:
“Early on, I took my colicky baby to one of those new-mothers’ groups. I wasn’t sure how to connect with them, but I desperately wanted to. But the affect seemed odd. The new mothers seemed to be talking in these falsely bright voices; all the anecdotes were mild ones of “the time she lost her pacifier on the bus” variety. No one seemed to feel like a bomb had gone off in their lives, and this made me feel very, very alone. Gaslighted, almost. Why weren’t we talking more about the complexity of this new experience?”
This resonates immensely with my new mom group experience. I would go. I would not know what to talk about. Our babies would be cute. I would feel awkward. I would leave knowing it was good that I got out of the house, but only feeling a little less lonely. I didn’t know how to reach out. Maybe the moms in these books will reach me.
Elkin says:
The new books on motherhood are a countercanon. They read against the literary canon with its lack of interest in the interior lives of mothers, against the shelves of “this is how you do it” books, and against the creeping hegemony of social-media motherhood.
I welcome this countercanon.
Feeling bummed because I know the savviest angle on my research is misinformation and disinformation but for my mental health I have to make them peripheral. I will not sacrifice my well-being for what is professionally savvy.
Finished reading: Not Here by Hieu Minh Nguyen 📚
📚 2/31 NOT HERE by Hieu Minh Nguyen. Excerpt from “Heavy”: “There are days when I give up on my body/but not the world.” #TheSealeyChallenge
From Hillary Frank: The Special Misogyny Reserved for Mothers
Despite receiving multiple rejections from radio station editors, journalist and author Hillary Frank kept her podcast about parenting, “The Longest Shortest Time,” going for three years before it was picked up by WNYC and then Stitcher.
She learned a lot making the show:
That parents can be civil with one another on the internet. That naming an episode “Boobs” will make it your most popular one ever. And that there is a special kind of misogyny reserved for mothers.
Her success with the show didn’t halt the misogyny, but it does show that moms can create success in their creative endeavors. Not only did she keep the podcast going without outside funding for three years, she continued to host it for four more years before transitioning to the role of executive producer. She also wrote Weird Parenting Wins, " a collection of personal essays about parenting, as well as crowdsourced parenting strategies from the worldwide LST community" (source).
Me: Napster is clearly the best P2P file sharing app.
W: Mmmm…
Me: What? What’s better than Napster?
W: Having money as an adult.
Finished reading: Unaccompanied by Javier Zamora 📚
From Austin Kleon: Books on art and motherhood
During my son’s first few weeks, I spent most of his naps reading about matrescence (the process of becoming a mother) and identity crises. What did I even care about anymore, besides keeping him alive? Writing? Performing? I’d spent the past three years developing an identity as an improv comedian. Where had that identity gone? Would I ever get it back? Did I even want it back? What about all the other creative identities I’d had before? I’d been a writer, singer, actor, dancer, cross-stitcher, crocheter… Were those people still inside me? At some point in all of my browsing, I ran across Austin Kleon’s recommendations for books on art and motherhood. I’m still on the first book on his list, but the fact that he could make a list gave me some hope that I could figure this out.
📚 1/31 UNACCOMPANIED by Javier Zamora. Excerpt from “Then, It Was So”: “…Cariño,/it was so quiet when I started/counting the days/I wasn’t woken by him.” #TheSealeyChallenge
